Saturday, June 21, 2008

Not Yet

It's never a good time

Just

Not yet

And I swear that if I hear another "God needed an angel in heaven and you were the most logical candidate" song I'll need to be restrained

God is God

If he needs an angel he can make one

He doesn't need that child

Or that one

Or that one

It was a hard year for you

Some life changes that were hard to accept

Maybe you didn't like the way your body was changing

Taking you from boy to pre-man

From child to  young adult

You were becoming a lost soul

And being gathered with other lost ones

Losing your way together

Finding comfort, maybe in your like lostness

A few who could see the good still in you but

There was perhaps a bit of relief when you were absent for awhile

And then concern

Then fear for your very life

And we prayed that God would bring you back

And give you another chance

We prayed for health

And healing

And life

But you are gone

And we are left with a numb sadness

You could have been my child

Or hers

Or his

And in spite of the pain and confusion and anger, maybe, that made you hard to handle sometimes

That led you to make foolish choices sometimes

That pushed you further into anger and confusion and pain

You were still a child

And you should have had another chance at life

You shouldn't be gone

Not yet

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